Originally Posted 1/23/15
Last night, every other mom on my friend's list started sharing this new video from Similac. At first glance, it appears to be a statement pleading for moms to stand in support of one another. But I have a few additional thoughts on this. Watch the video, and then we can discuss in the comments.
So here's the deal. This is funny. It made me laugh.There are some funny one-liners and the dads arguing over whether or not "it's all about the breasts" is hilarious. And it does end on a very emotional note - we're all in this together, even if we make different decisions. It gave me the warm fuzzies.
After sleeping on it, though, I realize I have a couple issues with this video.
#1 - Motherhood is being depicted in such a way that perpetuates the myth of the so called Mommy Wars. Which, quite frankly, I'm tired of. I'm tired of worrying about offending someone every time I share a research article about birth on my personal Facebook page. My heart says it's in the spirit of sharing information, but my head tells me SOMEONE is going to be offended. They're going to think it's a passive aggressive attempt to call them out as a bad mom. And that's stupid and not true. My heart says it's in the spirit of providing other moms with information I wish I had known YEARS earlier in my motherhood journey.
#2 - Moms don't really say this bunk to each other. Not moms who actually know and care for each other at least. And if you come across this with real life friends they aren't a real friend to begin with. Are there crazy internet trolls out there? Absolutely!
But real friends don't do this in real life. You know what DOES happen in real life? Moms playing out imaginary conversations in their heads. When we read something that makes us question our own parenting decisions, we naturally get defensive and picture the commentary we'd have with this so-called friend. Eventually we start believing that they're judging us. It's one of the many Mommy War Battles.
Here's the thing, though. It never happened. Therefore, there was no battle. Therefore, there is no Mommy War.
Like I said, are there jerks in the world? Yes. There are people who hide behind computer screens looking to poke at people. These aren't real people in the grand scheme of life. And the imaginary conversations we have where we confront someone for hypothetically questioning our parenting decisions - those aren't real either.
Moms, lets continue supporting each other. Let's do it without being manipulated into thinking others are judging us and causing us to get down on ourselves. We are fierce mothers. We make the best choices for our children with our whole hearts and with the information, support and circumstances we are given. THAT is what it's like to be in the real Sisterhood of Motherhood. It existed long before Similac made their video.
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